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Wife, Mother, Pastor

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6 Ways Female Ministers Can Protect Integrity

IMG_1628Yes, sometimes being the female pastor (and for some, the only female pastor on staff) can be difficult. But let’s face it- we’re different. Being different doesn’t mean we expect entitlement. It means that we will, at times, have to do things differently in order to protect our marriages, children and integrity. It’s important to keep boundaries no matter who you are. Here are a few ideas to help you protect those areas of your life and ministry:

1.) Always keep the door open. This may sound obvious, but it’s best never to be alone in a room with a man or child. If you need to talk sensitive, make sure the room or door has plenty of windows.

2.) Make sure there are two others in the church. I’m the first lady that shows up on Sunday morning. If there is only one car in the parking lot I wait until someone else shows up so I am not alone in the building with another man. This guideline stands good with children too.

3.) Don’t wear perfume. I actually read this in a pastor blog somewhere for men not to wear cologne. Smells do tantalizing things to the opposite sex. Most of us work with mostly men, and we even minister to men. Help keep their minds pure and leave the Victoria Secret scents for your hubby.

4.) Have a background check done on yourself. Your church might already do this, but if they don’t then spend the few dollars to get it done every couple years.

5.) Rent a car. Just like being alone with a man in the church or room, it’s best not to be alone in a car either. If it comes right down to it, I will rent a car to drive across the state to avoid riding with a fellow male co-worker. I can only remember once where I HAD to ride in a car with a former co-worker/youth pastor (and it was a mile drive).  In that instance I rode in the back seat.

6.) Include the pastor’s wife. Because I need to communicate with our youth pastor quite a bit, I often include his wife. Whether in person, via FB messaging or text, I add her to the conversation. Not only for accountability sake, but she should be included on topics and ideas going on in the ministry, don’t you think?

Satan is out to steal, kill and destroy people and ministries. Including yours.

Call me a prude, and that’s fine, but Proverbs 22:1 says, “Choose a good reputation over great riches; being held in high esteem is better than silver or gold.” (NLT)

I’d rather have higher standards for the sake of a good reputation and integrity, than lower standards for the sake of convenience.

What would you add?

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